Will you have a heavenly chat?

Sometimes someone contacts me following the loss of their spouse, as they know they need to get a Will in place.

Sometimes the absent spouse died suddenly and very unexpectedly. Sometimes it was following a short or long illness. Either way, the person is left knowing that they need to get their affairs in order.

The areas to think about, are the same as if you’d come to me as a couple.

Who are the executors going to be, the people you trust to sort things out after you’ve died? Who will you appoint as the guardians, to bring up children to adulthood? And who will you benefit and what’s the back up plan if you’re all “wiped out”?

I try to be as sensitive as I can be, when approaching this subject, but I highly recommend having the conversation with the late spouse, that you would have if you were both still here.

You would both have had views about who is responsible enough to be an executor. Thoughts about guardians tend to involve a lot of emotion, and again, to work it through as a couple, knowing what your partner would have said if they were still here, can be helpful. When considering the “wipe out” provision, it’s useful to consider what you would have decided as a couple. It’s normal to include both “sides” of the family in the wipe out provision. Just because one of you is no longer here, does not mean it’s logical to exclude those priorities. If your spouse didn’t get on with a sibling, you may provide for the children of that sibling, if you think that’s what they would have done.

The idea of a heavenly chat with your late spouse, may feel comforting and also practical.

Only do it if it’s helpful, and let me know how you get on.

If you’re still in a position to have the discussion as an earthly couple, please go ahead and have it.

If there’s anything you think you’d benefit from discussing with me, or seeking a fresh perspective on, get in touch. My office line is 01727 840 240 and my email is jane@jcwillsandprobate.co.uk and I’m always happy to help.